Because they called me on a mission

Because they called me on a mission
I grew at least a foot or two.
I learned and became much more ready
To teach and live and serve my whole life through.

</cheesy song>

It was eight years ago yesterday that I left Brasil. It was eight years ago today that I arrived in the States. And it was eight years ago tomorrow that I met with my new stake president and was released as a full time missionary for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

Leaving Brasil – the group of missionaries that left the same time I did.

A last picture with Presidente e Sister Paulsen before leaving, yes my arms really were that brown.

Back in the States.

In preparation for General Conference next weekend, I have been reading through all of the talks that were given at the last General Conference in October. Sister Allred of the Relief Society General Presidency said the following:

My mission had a great impact on my life. I learned to rely more on the Lord, to seek the guidance of the Spirit, and to feel an overwhelming love for God’s children. My knowledge of the scriptures and my understanding of the doctrines increased. So did my desire to be obedient and to keep the commandments with exactness. My testimony of the Savior and His infinite Atonement was strengthened. My missionary experiences became part of who and what I am. Missionary work became my passion. It has impacted my life and that of my family more than anything else.

She then quoted Elder Holland who said:

My mission means everything to me 47 years after the fact. There may have been one day in those 47 years that I have not thought of my mission; I’m just not sure what day that would have been.

(Silvia H. Allred, “Go Ye Therefore,” Ensign, Nov 2008, 10-12)

I have been thinking about those quotes, my mission, and my life now. I’m sure I could stand with Elder Holland and say there is a possibility I’ve had a day that my mission hasn’t affected, but I really don’t know if I could say what that day was (I know 8 years isn’t nearly 47 years, work with me on this).

I also found this quote from President Hinckley that I was given early on in my mission and kept with me throughout it.

Now, my dear young friends, I hope all of you are pointed in the direction of missionary service. I cannot promise you fun. I cannot promise you ease and comfort. I cannot promise you freedom from discouragement, from fear, from downright misery at times. But I can promise you that you will grow as you have never grown in a similar period during your entire lives. I can promise you a happiness that will be unique and wonderful and lasting. I can promise you that you will reevaluate your lives, that you will establish new priorities, that you will live closer to the Lord, that prayer will become a real and wonderful experience, that you will walk with faith in the outcome of the good things you do.
President Hinckley, “To the Boys and to the Men,” General Conference, October, 1998.

What have I gained from my mission? I could go on and on with stories of how my life was changed by those 18 months (and people who have talked with me at great length have surely heard a lot). It changed and affected every aspect of my life in some way or another. In an effort to keep things simple though, let’s see if I can write a list. I know that no matter how hard I try, this list will be incomplete.

• Because of my mission, I have been an endowed member of the LDS church for almost ten years now. The blessings I have received from temple service could also not be fully listed.
• I learned to study, understand, and appreciate the scriptures; to drink them in more fully and make them a part of my life. The kick start a mission gave to my scripture study continues today.
• I became much closer to the Spirit. I learned how the Spirit speaks to me. I learned the language of the Spirit, just as my dad said I would before I left. I cannot count the times when I have felt the Spirit guiding me in my life or comforting me in times of need. I recognize the Spirit better than I understand some people.
• I learned Portuguese. One of the first things they taught us in the MTC was how to pray in Portuguese. My personal prayers are still said in Portuguese. It is the language of prayer for me. And as I’ve been reading the October General Conference talks in Portuguese this time around (I gave away my English copy of them), I’ve found myself stumbling over words again as they try to first come out in Portuguese before I remember I need to say them in English.
• I learned to eat beans. But I still prefer black beans over any other type.
• I learned I can do hard things.
• I felt a love greater than I’d ever experienced before.
• I learned there is more than one type of exhaustion (physical). There is also spiritual, emotional, mental, psychological…
• I gained a greater understanding and appreciation for the organization of the Church and how well it is run.
• My prayers changed. I can’t say my prayers are always the best still, but while prayer was always an important aspect of my life, it was magnified one hundred fold and continues to be a life-line in my life.
• My testimony became both deeper and more simple at the same time.
• I wrote daily in my journal from age 11 till the MTC. I wish I had been better about writing in my journal on my mission. But since returning home, my journal has become less of a day-to-day recording of my activities. Instead I now write about my reactions, my feelings, my thoughts, and how they are all connected. The journal I write now is the story of me, whereas the journal I wrote before was more the story of what I did.
• I wear orthotics now, and will till I die. My arches fell on my mission. The podiatrist said that it probably would’ve happened at some point in my life, but if I hadn’t spent 18 months walking 10+ miles a day, it probably wouldn’t have happened until I was 70 or so.
• You really can’t look anywhere in my house and not see something from my mission, a picture, a wall hanging, a book, a figure. It’s part of my daily surroundings.
• The people I met continue to influence my life, both those I still have contact with and those I’ve lost touch with.

Would I still have learned the lessons I needed to learn in this life if I hadn’t served a mission? Probably. Would I be who I am and where I am if I hadn’t? Part of me doubts it.

As one of my companions and I use to say, “mais bençãos” (more blessings). I wouldn’t trade anything for what I gained on my mission. But I don’t think I’d want to go back and do it again either. It was HARD. Yet the blessings are daily and innumerable.